You know when you're too careful revising your writings and yet there's always mistakes you overlooked?
I hate when things like this happen. I hate thinking I've raised enough defense against something, thinking I've planned out all the possibilities, and then noticing the flaws still leaked in exactly through that place I thought I had taken care of. Mostly, I hate how often this still happens.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Of Gamification and analogies
I am afraid I'm not as much of a gamer as I used to be, but damn I don't regret the insame ammount of time I've spent playing video games. There would be a time where I would, as I always listen how games can't make a difference in your life, it's all but entertainment and etc, but I tried thinking of it entirely by myself and I realized that maybe my life wouldn't be the same without them. They were helpful and influential to me. Maybe as much as reading books. I'm sure to lose credibility after saying that, but whatever, this is fucking freedom for me. See, games motivated me to think by myself.
So there's this web show I've been watching lately called Extra Credits, where they talk about the game industry. I really like their informal yet really mature approach to the subjects (unnecessarily annoying voice, though). I feel like I'm influenced by their how they like naming things for the sake of easy-handling, just like I do. Anyway, one of their episodes was about Gamification. It means, simply put, using what make games interesting to make our daily tasks more engaging and rewarding. It's not a groundbreaking concept when you think about it, and even I had already thought about it before, but this episode helped me having it clearer in my head. Seriously, watch it, it's probably more worth the next minutes of your life than reading the rest of this post.
I'm sure most people, as kids, would think of spaceships and horseriding (ok, us boys) when helping with the house chores. That sure made the tasks more engaging, and I don't know why we had to take the fun factor out of it as we grew older. Sure a 30-year-old riding a broom like Harry Potter is totally facepalm, but that's not the point. I mean, some imagination can only do us good.
See, I wash the dishes (I'll be honest here, I don't do it much too often) by thinking of them like hordes of enemies. I fight the easiers ones first - silverware and glasses (these are like those colorful bubbles that are always the first enemies that show up). Then dishes, which vary in difficulty. Pans are definitely like bosses! There are some greasy ones that are really tough! Sometimes I take a deep breath first before facing them (try using soundtracks, it's amazing).
Ok, I don't actually think of it like real fights (not always). It's more like trying to get the same feeling I would have if I was defeating enemies with a controller. The same feeling of engagement and excitement, that's the point (I wouldn't like the feeling of fighting enemies in real life). And then, instead of being tired of doing some boring shit, I actually feel like doing more boring shit! Isn't that totally awesome?
I had already been feeling like using gaming-related ideas to help me visualize better my thoughts. It's mainly RPG elements like equipping armors and weapons, indexing spells, leveling up skills, or upgrading items. Maybe that's the reason Zelda, Metroid and Castlevania are my top favorite series.
Gamification is extremely useful for analogies, bringing a new system from where I can bring new ideas and use them in other systems. In these three series I've mentioned, you can always explore the whole world, and when you find a new item, you can go back to the previous areas and explore them better, finding new items and treasures. Not exactly accurate, but Backtrack will its temporary name. Can't you see how this can be used in other systems? If I learn a trick with pick strokes to make a different sound come out, I can try it in all songs I know. If I learn a new trick with the pencil strokes, I can backtrack and see how I can improve all things I used to draw. If I learn a new idea, it'll work on my mind like, hm, it's an example I've mentioned in a previous entry, it'll be like these workers from Civilization who'll improve the terrain if you got a new technology available, like highways. See where it's going?
And that's the thing about analogies, sometimes some things are clearer in a system than it's in others. Sometimes, by focusing entirely on one area only, some things will take a huge ammount of time for you to realize, while it would happen pretty quickly in another area. And by using analogies I can use what I've learned in one area in others, so I can pretty much learn several things when I've actually learned it only once. Take an example, Firm Grip, which I'll explore in a future entry, is something I've learned with drawing, but I have already applied it to music, driving, talking, decision-making, and I can try to apply it to any skill I am still starting to develop.
I also like how thinking with gamification on can spice up my thinking, making it much more interesting, much more fun and satisfying - even fucking easier! Maybe that's the reason I've being playing less games. Thinking actually became my favorite game. Treasure Hunting in my mind is not as frustrating as as doing them in Alundra or Diablo II or the Reverse Castle in Symphony of the Night. I truly hated fighting through a forest to find a single herb (which I'm unable to carry!), or always finding useless empty chests laying around, or finding lame items like Roast Beef in that altar room surrounded by dozens of Chtuhlu-like demons.
Oh god, it feels good to open my heart.
So there's this web show I've been watching lately called Extra Credits, where they talk about the game industry. I really like their informal yet really mature approach to the subjects (unnecessarily annoying voice, though). I feel like I'm influenced by their how they like naming things for the sake of easy-handling, just like I do. Anyway, one of their episodes was about Gamification. It means, simply put, using what make games interesting to make our daily tasks more engaging and rewarding. It's not a groundbreaking concept when you think about it, and even I had already thought about it before, but this episode helped me having it clearer in my head. Seriously, watch it, it's probably more worth the next minutes of your life than reading the rest of this post.
I'm sure most people, as kids, would think of spaceships and horseriding (ok, us boys) when helping with the house chores. That sure made the tasks more engaging, and I don't know why we had to take the fun factor out of it as we grew older. Sure a 30-year-old riding a broom like Harry Potter is totally facepalm, but that's not the point. I mean, some imagination can only do us good.
See, I wash the dishes (I'll be honest here, I don't do it much too often) by thinking of them like hordes of enemies. I fight the easiers ones first - silverware and glasses (these are like those colorful bubbles that are always the first enemies that show up). Then dishes, which vary in difficulty. Pans are definitely like bosses! There are some greasy ones that are really tough! Sometimes I take a deep breath first before facing them (try using soundtracks, it's amazing).
Ok, I don't actually think of it like real fights (not always). It's more like trying to get the same feeling I would have if I was defeating enemies with a controller. The same feeling of engagement and excitement, that's the point (I wouldn't like the feeling of fighting enemies in real life). And then, instead of being tired of doing some boring shit, I actually feel like doing more boring shit! Isn't that totally awesome?
I had already been feeling like using gaming-related ideas to help me visualize better my thoughts. It's mainly RPG elements like equipping armors and weapons, indexing spells, leveling up skills, or upgrading items. Maybe that's the reason Zelda, Metroid and Castlevania are my top favorite series.
Gamification is extremely useful for analogies, bringing a new system from where I can bring new ideas and use them in other systems. In these three series I've mentioned, you can always explore the whole world, and when you find a new item, you can go back to the previous areas and explore them better, finding new items and treasures. Not exactly accurate, but Backtrack will its temporary name. Can't you see how this can be used in other systems? If I learn a trick with pick strokes to make a different sound come out, I can try it in all songs I know. If I learn a new trick with the pencil strokes, I can backtrack and see how I can improve all things I used to draw. If I learn a new idea, it'll work on my mind like, hm, it's an example I've mentioned in a previous entry, it'll be like these workers from Civilization who'll improve the terrain if you got a new technology available, like highways. See where it's going?
And that's the thing about analogies, sometimes some things are clearer in a system than it's in others. Sometimes, by focusing entirely on one area only, some things will take a huge ammount of time for you to realize, while it would happen pretty quickly in another area. And by using analogies I can use what I've learned in one area in others, so I can pretty much learn several things when I've actually learned it only once. Take an example, Firm Grip, which I'll explore in a future entry, is something I've learned with drawing, but I have already applied it to music, driving, talking, decision-making, and I can try to apply it to any skill I am still starting to develop.
I also like how thinking with gamification on can spice up my thinking, making it much more interesting, much more fun and satisfying - even fucking easier! Maybe that's the reason I've being playing less games. Thinking actually became my favorite game. Treasure Hunting in my mind is not as frustrating as as doing them in Alundra or Diablo II or the Reverse Castle in Symphony of the Night. I truly hated fighting through a forest to find a single herb (which I'm unable to carry!), or always finding useless empty chests laying around, or finding lame items like Roast Beef in that altar room surrounded by dozens of Chtuhlu-like demons.
Oh god, it feels good to open my heart.
Of Testing
If one's is going to try some heuristic learning, one can't be too careful about what thoughts are about to get in. Mindtraps are always lurking around.
So whenever I find a new idea, I try looking for things that prove it to be right. Before finding examples that give it support, it's way too weak to stand on its own. Some of my strongest ideas are the ones that I can constantly find examples to prove them right (or at least acceptable), and after several layers of confirmation, they become Solid. Before that they're too... Yeah, Flacid. That name sounds amusingly fit.
There's this place where thoughts are left to be tested. As I can't trust them yet, I can't let them have any influence over me. So it's like, um, an academy. And when they get their degree, they are free to roam my mind and do their job (it reminds of those workers in Civilization that always set out to improve your grounds after an upgrade, like discovering how to make bridges or how to mine gold).
Of course, things like this always work much better in theory. I could only wish I had this much control over my thoughts. But some effort and discipline can make them work good enough.
I think I could start thinking of effort like some kind of currency...
So whenever I find a new idea, I try looking for things that prove it to be right. Before finding examples that give it support, it's way too weak to stand on its own. Some of my strongest ideas are the ones that I can constantly find examples to prove them right (or at least acceptable), and after several layers of confirmation, they become Solid. Before that they're too... Yeah, Flacid. That name sounds amusingly fit.
There's this place where thoughts are left to be tested. As I can't trust them yet, I can't let them have any influence over me. So it's like, um, an academy. And when they get their degree, they are free to roam my mind and do their job (it reminds of those workers in Civilization that always set out to improve your grounds after an upgrade, like discovering how to make bridges or how to mine gold).
Of course, things like this always work much better in theory. I could only wish I had this much control over my thoughts. But some effort and discipline can make them work good enough.
I think I could start thinking of effort like some kind of currency...
Of stars
Today the lights went out, so I went out to check the night sky.
I find it incredibly cute the way you stars shy away from our lights. And then, when you display all of your glory when we fade out, making us shrink humbly in amazement, I can only respect you.
I think there's no experience that can drive my thoughts away into the wildest wonderings like watching a starry sky, realizing all the fucking vastness of space. In nights like this we can even see the milky way crossing the sky... and to realize it's made by stars - the same way water molecules form a cloud - wow...
Anyway, there I was watching that magnificent view. It was quite an experience, this whole pitch-black valley with a few patterned golden lights, then low clouds swirling around the mountains, reddened by distant city lights, and slowly above that, as if the line putting earth and sky apart couldn't be defined, a deep blue hugeness filled with all these delicate and magical shiny dots...
Cold thing, the starry sky. Maybe it's the dark and uncaring vastness filled with infinite, white diamond dust. I usually feel that if could reach up and touch the sky, the stars, as sharp as they look, would cut the the point of my fingers. But there they are, looking so tempting, making us yearn towards them, and yet being so irrevocably distant and untouchable.
And there I was tasting the sounds of my guitar when my father came by, and we started a conversation about stars. It was when he was telling me a silly yet funny joke about a king who asked a thief about the number of the stars in the sky while I was trying to scratch a melody out of the guitar that I felt that moment was remarkable. It made me think, hey, fuck technology. I could spend the whole night there, playing music, listening to old stories and watching the stars. Um, I think a modest fire with pulsating embers and crackling sounds could spice up the experience.
I find it incredibly cute the way you stars shy away from our lights. And then, when you display all of your glory when we fade out, making us shrink humbly in amazement, I can only respect you.
I think there's no experience that can drive my thoughts away into the wildest wonderings like watching a starry sky, realizing all the fucking vastness of space. In nights like this we can even see the milky way crossing the sky... and to realize it's made by stars - the same way water molecules form a cloud - wow...
Anyway, there I was watching that magnificent view. It was quite an experience, this whole pitch-black valley with a few patterned golden lights, then low clouds swirling around the mountains, reddened by distant city lights, and slowly above that, as if the line putting earth and sky apart couldn't be defined, a deep blue hugeness filled with all these delicate and magical shiny dots...
Cold thing, the starry sky. Maybe it's the dark and uncaring vastness filled with infinite, white diamond dust. I usually feel that if could reach up and touch the sky, the stars, as sharp as they look, would cut the the point of my fingers. But there they are, looking so tempting, making us yearn towards them, and yet being so irrevocably distant and untouchable.
And there I was tasting the sounds of my guitar when my father came by, and we started a conversation about stars. It was when he was telling me a silly yet funny joke about a king who asked a thief about the number of the stars in the sky while I was trying to scratch a melody out of the guitar that I felt that moment was remarkable. It made me think, hey, fuck technology. I could spend the whole night there, playing music, listening to old stories and watching the stars. Um, I think a modest fire with pulsating embers and crackling sounds could spice up the experience.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Of admiration
I talked with my mother earlier today, and I told her some of the least worrisome things that have been nailing me to my bed. At the same time she implicitly allowed me to feel comfortable with crying (in front of someone), she could make me smile just as easily. Even when talking about all the depressions she's been through herself, she was capable of showing a remarkable sense of humor and making me laugh in midst of tears.
I have no words to express how much I love this woman, but I feel glad I had a chance to hug her and tell I love her.
I have no words to express how much I love this woman, but I feel glad I had a chance to hug her and tell I love her.
Of cozy places
It's cold in here, but I can feel comfort in the warmth inside my jacket, feeling my chest folded in heat. My hands are freezing, though. I could try landing them on my warm face and exchange temperatures with it, but soon my hands will freeze again.
I wish I had a friend who could show up at the door right now and hug me. I wish I had someone willing to exchange temperatures with me, someone who could lend me a little more warmth. Just a shoulder where I could find some rest.
I miss my cozy bed. I've been in love with it in the last few days. They're great lovers, beds. They are always there, they're always glad to make me feel comfortable. I like how they my maintain my heat, specially how it allows me to curl up and focus on the heat my body is producing. Amazing thing, life and heat.
I dream of comfortable places. I constantly feel like longing to be alone in a dark, silent room fully warmed by a wood-fired oven. Embers and flames lighting the room eerily. And distract myself with the taste of the bittersweet smell of burned wood and stinking smoke. I like thinking that whatever is going on outside, a savage windstorm or a freezing rain, it's bound to stay outside.
But sometimes I feel cheating by seeking warmth. Maybe I should try wearing off my jacket and taste the cold hurting my skin acutely. This physical pain might distract myself a little from this abstract pain I can't get rid of.
Maybe there's somebody out there in the cold who could enjoy the warmth of my place. I could go out and look for them, and we could drink some hot, spicy soup, and talk all night long...
I wish I had a friend who could show up at the door right now and hug me. I wish I had someone willing to exchange temperatures with me, someone who could lend me a little more warmth. Just a shoulder where I could find some rest.
I miss my cozy bed. I've been in love with it in the last few days. They're great lovers, beds. They are always there, they're always glad to make me feel comfortable. I like how they my maintain my heat, specially how it allows me to curl up and focus on the heat my body is producing. Amazing thing, life and heat.
I dream of comfortable places. I constantly feel like longing to be alone in a dark, silent room fully warmed by a wood-fired oven. Embers and flames lighting the room eerily. And distract myself with the taste of the bittersweet smell of burned wood and stinking smoke. I like thinking that whatever is going on outside, a savage windstorm or a freezing rain, it's bound to stay outside.
But sometimes I feel cheating by seeking warmth. Maybe I should try wearing off my jacket and taste the cold hurting my skin acutely. This physical pain might distract myself a little from this abstract pain I can't get rid of.
Maybe there's somebody out there in the cold who could enjoy the warmth of my place. I could go out and look for them, and we could drink some hot, spicy soup, and talk all night long...
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Of help
I've been having this feeling that if I were to scream how much pain I feel and how much love I need, all I would hear is someone, after rising the head melancholically, saying calmly "well, get in the line".
Of hobbies
When I listen to a voice for a long time, it seems my mind stores all its possible pronounciations and tones and idiossyncrasies and whatnot. It's weird then that the voice starts wandering around my mind and I can play with it in my head, thinking of things that voice can say. Sometimes I like thinking of things its owner would never say. So I can imagine that cute girl delivering a "oh i like you too, handsome" in a much more believable way, despite being utterly pathetic.
So one of these days Hitler speeching showed up in my mind. Mind you, I know as much German as the average eskimo. That didn't prevent me from manipulating the sounds somehow I know are unique to the german language. I don't know if in-between the nein, nein, nein's I was making him say "Squash that rebel scum" or "I'm selling these fine leather jackets", but it was still entertaining. Hey, um, I guess it's pretty much how I play with music in my head, which I mentioned in a previous entry.
So one of these days Hitler speeching showed up in my mind. Mind you, I know as much German as the average eskimo. That didn't prevent me from manipulating the sounds somehow I know are unique to the german language. I don't know if in-between the nein, nein, nein's I was making him say "Squash that rebel scum" or "I'm selling these fine leather jackets", but it was still entertaining. Hey, um, I guess it's pretty much how I play with music in my head, which I mentioned in a previous entry.
Of Flesh-deep
I've noticed my beard seems to grow better and healthier if I press the razor blade real hard against the skin, as if I wanted to peel it off. I like the how the skin aches thanks to the rudeness of the act.
That reminds me of when when I spray some medication over a wound and it hurts bitterly. My mother used to tell me that's a good sign. It means something is happening there. If the wound feels threatened by the antiseptic, then you can trust it's doing its job.
Maybe that's why I see beauty in conflict and pain. Some things can only be born from conflict or pain.That's a fit metaphor, after all it's with pain our mothers gave us birth. I like to remember that when I'm facing problems when conflict and pain is unavoidable. I guess it's comforting to think there must be pain before the healing (yeah, I know that sounds like religious comfort, but let's not hurry into petty realizations, please).
That reminds me of when when I spray some medication over a wound and it hurts bitterly. My mother used to tell me that's a good sign. It means something is happening there. If the wound feels threatened by the antiseptic, then you can trust it's doing its job.
Maybe that's why I see beauty in conflict and pain. Some things can only be born from conflict or pain.That's a fit metaphor, after all it's with pain our mothers gave us birth. I like to remember that when I'm facing problems when conflict and pain is unavoidable. I guess it's comforting to think there must be pain before the healing (yeah, I know that sounds like religious comfort, but let's not hurry into petty realizations, please).
Of Contrasting
I've been talking a lot about them Hymns, but sometimes a bond between me and the song sometimes are unclear to me until a moment of great realization.
One of these days I was in the line at the market, and there were some random songs playing in my music player. I was just distracting myself with all these colorful candies tempting us in the line when a song from the Silent Hill 2 soundtrack started playing. Suddenly I felt kinda... naked and exposed, like I was doing something extremely private and intimate in public (no, I wasn't feeling like jerking off).
That feeling was just too weird, and I felt extremely compelled to analyse it. It wasn't hard to find the answer: I usually listen to that soundtrack in moments of deep introspection, when I'm all alone in my room, all lights out. Sometimes watching the world outside, or staring at the roof. And that connection, it seems to happen naturally. Maybe the songs make me feel like introspecting, or maybe I feel in a mood to listen to them when I'm already being introspective. I don't know for certain, but that's of least importance.
Anyway, now i've been thinking... if this contrast allowed me to recognize this hymn, then shouldn't I be able to optimize this process, to optimitze realization through contrasting?
One of these days I was in the line at the market, and there were some random songs playing in my music player. I was just distracting myself with all these colorful candies tempting us in the line when a song from the Silent Hill 2 soundtrack started playing. Suddenly I felt kinda... naked and exposed, like I was doing something extremely private and intimate in public (no, I wasn't feeling like jerking off).
That feeling was just too weird, and I felt extremely compelled to analyse it. It wasn't hard to find the answer: I usually listen to that soundtrack in moments of deep introspection, when I'm all alone in my room, all lights out. Sometimes watching the world outside, or staring at the roof. And that connection, it seems to happen naturally. Maybe the songs make me feel like introspecting, or maybe I feel in a mood to listen to them when I'm already being introspective. I don't know for certain, but that's of least importance.
Anyway, now i've been thinking... if this contrast allowed me to recognize this hymn, then shouldn't I be able to optimize this process, to optimitze realization through contrasting?