Of creative process

It's when I'm in bed trying to sleep but helplessly thinking about life that I have my most fascinating ideas, and it's not because of the thinking. As the rational part of my brain is busy with its rational thoughts trying to figure out the world, once in a while the other side of the brain starts distracting itself with random stuff, like when you start doodling when you're too bored.

It's been some time now, I've noticed my mind sometimes creates music. I never payed attention to it since it's obviously a song that already exists. But then I started to realize that sometimes what I'm feeling is a somewhat original music, because I can usually recognize the obvious influence behind it (I guess it happens when the song I've been listening to touches me in a different way than just being so-awesome). I think I've fed my mind with so much music that it can make a living with the stored music. I guess that if I spend a lot of time listening to jazz, for example, I'll try to learn the characteristics that make the sound and style unique like it's second nature
And it's all kind of music. I don't really have any control over what it's going to be. Sometimes it's a folky tune, or an orchestral piece, or an annoying pop song, or some d'n'b jam or some drone ambient. I usually think only of sounds and rhythms, so it's not like I'm aware of all instruments and even theory. But I've once thought of a violin creaking a melody out, note by note. And one of these days the song was a cool guitar riff someone was humming (someone who sounded like, huh, Mike Rourke).

My mind also plays with visual things. One of these days my mind was being bombarded with visions of all kind of machinery. It was not a thing I was entirely conscious of. I didn't come and think "ok, I'll think of machines now". While I'm thinking about my problems, the images started sneaking in by themselves. All in second plan or something, like a slideshow on a wall while you're in a reunion.

As I start noticing it's going on and that it's much more interesting than whatever I'm doing at the moment, like when you're studying and you listen to your neighbour playing music (decently) and you head your mind towards the song, I usually abandon whatever I am thinking so I can taste the imagery or the music. And then I noticed that, despite some images being just things I've seen in during my life recurring to my mind, I can actually work on them. I can "study" the machinery logistics and hidraulic mechanisms and test their functionality (nice skills for being a concept artist, I guess). Of course, I barely know how most of things really work, but I can visualize them or a part of them. I also have a small ammount of control over the songs playing in my head. Again, I'm no real musician, I still barely know by heart the sound each note makes and I hardly know most musical terminology, but it just happens, the songs comes to my mind... intuitively, and I can change the rhythm, or "ask" the song to build up or something like that.

When there's real music going on, the creative process increases a thousandfold. I can't recall all the mental images that already came to my mind when I'm listening to a song. I was once listening to this mindblowing guitar solo, and my mind just designed this amazing guitar, which looked very agressive, but by now I have forgotten how it really looks like in details. I remember one of these days I was listening to a heavy song, and colors started dancing on my mind. A violent black blackground, with harsh strokes of red and orange. It could be an awesome oil painting. Sometimes I am listening to a delicate song and I get visions of watercolor.

I have my guess the black-and-red vision was inspired by this. But you see, no oil painting (and that was no Mostly Autumn-related song).

 

I think this all just consequential stuff. You see, there's too much information around us on a daily basis for us to absorb properly. I think this is just a moment where my mind starts digesting things. Then there's this moment where all the things start coming in. It's when they start making sense and they blend together, enabling me to form something I can call my own.
And then that's why I keep practicing my artistic skills. Sometimes I have an urge to make these things real and it's frustrating not to able to translate my vision in drawings.