It took me some time in my life, but I started finally made sense of
all my ramblings and saw a common theme through it all. I like the
creation, the instinctive composition, the inventive distortion, the
evolving fluidity. I'd like to understand how the popping of a new
idea happens, and what are the circumstances involved.
But I keep talking about it and I want to be creative myself. I try
to show myself creative through these exercises, but recently I am
feeling ashamed about how I fail to meet those standards. Even to
keep up with ideas I used to have, I can't create content like I used
to do.
When asking some friends how do they get to be creative, they see
nothing to be talked about, for everything is just handled to them.
There's just no struggle for them. They've got no trances of absurd
geniality where they can seem to enter a bonus stage and harvest as
many ideas as they can. Strange. It seems to happen only to me.
I wonder if it's just a passing phase, or if this is not my thing. I
feel like giving up with the frustration that it is the ridiculous
balance between effort and time invested and ideas, creations and
products squeezed out. I have to find out somehow. And reverse the
results if negative.
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