When my philantropical desires are getting just too strong, I’ve noticed I’ve grown to have a burning feeling inside me to make sacrifices. It’s not simply giving others benefits before me, but rather the very sacrifice of my life for others.
It’s a weird thought to have. I live my little life here and hardly I see lives being menaced around me, and I think that I would hardly have the courage to make such a step right there at the heat of the moment, or maybe I could, I don’t know.
In the end it seems to me that this intense, almost ridiculous desire to do good could simply be a way for me to unguilt myself. Maybe these are proportional forces, the more guilt I feel, the stronger is my desire to step up for redemption.