April was a happy month. It’s been quite a
while since I last felt so good about myself for so long. Something I did in
March was so amazing that the scourgers were almost instantaneously defeated. I
guess I just finally learned not to care. And it was such a nuclear surgery
that I feel I was definitely healed from most mental conditions troubling me
these past months. Ilium scores!
It would have been glorious if it wasn’t for
two things. At least scourgers were sent astray, but Hrungnir became
particularly scary and the constant colics and abdominal pain prevented me from
making a good use of my time (and not being able to do some things, like
finishing my texts in here, indicates an invasion of Ilium
and failing of the flames). And Helminth seemed to have his part on it as I had
to be careful with my emotions, so Vesta had to go alone in the duty of trying
to defeat and encage the beast, but he was always returning. How could this
fucker be brought down? At least now I’m finally learning of its true weak
points and so I’m almost vanquishing him too. And Vesta is learning a lot from
that, and she was forced to develop her skills with the spells, I hope
Hephaestus can benefit from that.
The second thing, again I’m noticing a pattern
similar to February. As more comfortable I feel about myself, the more I’m
prone to not do my job here. And so there are so few texts again, and I feel
really incapable of writing great amount of texts or even feeling willing to do
so.
Although I’m to be blamed, not talking about a
lot of the recent thoughts was fortunate to fit this new concern, namely
Hermetic Rule, which is going to be the characteristic aspect of my thoughts
this month. I lost several ideas because of this concern with figuring out
these joints, but once I find the right foundations, it’ll be worth it.
Though in the last minute the magic happened and I managed to make one
of the best Needlework efforts I feel I’ve ever done (also because of the small
amount of texts), I am feeling this is standing in my way. I have to take care
of my health and I have other projects and classes to attend to as I focus on
my Vitruvian Rule, so this is being pretty much a heavy obligation beeping in
my head constantly. This isn’t being as fun and enthralling as it used be, but
as I don’t want to give up nor get sick of it, I will keep it low, very low.
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