Saturday, March 31, 2012

Of my legacy

In this realm I am the master. All here is mine, all my accomplishments, and also all my failures are but my responsibility (I can’t pass the blame on). But the risk and the tremors are paying off, I am starting to get comfortable here, my skills are demanding less effort from me, more rewarding too. However, I know I have more potential to unleash.

It’s a feeling I don’t think I’d ever expect to feel, to notice those idea being really important to my daily life and noticing that I haven’t read about them… I haven’t heard from someone… Holy shit, I’ve created them. These are my ideas, they are the result of my effort, my intelligence and my creativity. I’m proud of something that I’ve done on my own, and that is a clean, sincere and original dedication. This is a sign that I’m doing something worthwhile in my future… I’m doing it now.

But I shouldn’t worry about getting so developed this fast. Hell, “Unload The Overloaded” comes before “develop the underdeveloped”. I shouldn’t hurry. Indeed, I’ve been finding that keeping it in a slow but steady pace seem to be most effective. I don’t know why I’ve been so eager to try to get to my full potential this soon. Hell, several famous writers started their careers around their thirties, like Arthur Conan Doyle, Mark Twain and George Orwell. In fact, when I think about it, maybe this desperate martial sprint I’ve made from last year seems to have put me in some advantage already.

It is not a silly feeling of superiority. For god’s sake, Vesta doesn’t allow me to deny it, I deserve this feeling of satisfaction after all my effort (and if one’s to argue against, I believe they’re trespassing their own boundaries of reason), it’s as important as falling. If Vesta is to be a neutral flame, she can very well let me rejoice my accomplishments. It’s very comforting to my soul to sit back and realize that it is happening. To think my dreams are becoming real, even though through small steps… but I can’t commemorate this soon for something that has barely begun. But I’m glad to find a solid template already set.

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