Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Of Opals

Although Garnets remind me of scary and frightening stuff, somehow it doesn’t feel entirely connected to this other heavy feeling of blackness. Of course, they are neighboring and it’s easy to connect them. But as creepy as Garnets are creepy, they can be classy. Black Opals are to represent the crest through which Trygve is born. It’s the disheveled and deformed. It’s pain in its most desperate and chaotic way.

It’s also the crest of roughness and weariness of the world. It is, in some ways, a notion of realism. It’s the undeniability of characteristics of the world, such as the poverty, illness, death and the dementia.

I don’t really know how it got to me like this. I have never been exposed to a murder scene, or even seen any grave accidents that would lead to fractured bones or wounds spilling blood out. I don’t know what experiences I’ve had to have it other than playing Silent Hill and watching other horror stuff and listening to black metal. Or maybe it’s a crest-through-absence, forcing myself to see the worst the world could show. I don’t think Dark Amethysts could have built this, although it has made me get acquainted with the feeling of hunger and pain. I don’t know, I just know it exists. In certain situations, when the crest is ready and calling, I can reach to it and it blackens my soul as I think of it. It’s the crest responsible for regurgitation of screams, blood and torn-out bodies. I can’t shut my eyes off to because it’s coming from inside me, my eyes already closed.

I think the origins of Opals are the Garnets gone extreme. After all, these regurgitations always happened since I was a child, when I was in bed and for some reason I said to myself not to think of scary stuff, and there were werewolves with their vicious eyes and bloodstained mouths - tombstones broken to pieces as the beast was digging and pulling the decomposed creature out from the grave.

The only problem is that, as a crest, it has its demands. It calls for being experienced, and once in a while I’ve got to attend to it. But I particularly don’t have any problems with it. I know it’s sick, and I know it’s even very unlike me as in real life I don’t really have the guts for gruesome accidents. But it’s something paradoxical as, through the crest satisfaction, I always feel so much lighter about life after getting in touch with it And then all other gems are suddenly so white-like, like Opals would purge and cleanse them from the black poignant stains.

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