Friday, August 31, 2012

Of exigencies beyond our skills

There is a whole world of activities that requires a level of skill that I don’t possess. It’s terribly frustrating as it wears out my confidence instantaneously. Those areas are where Scourgers can reign and that my team of blazing lights must fight to conquer.

It’s astoundingly easy to get yourself to this level of exigency. All you have to do is to try to dominate as many elements of logistics as possible, and trying to do the most perfect result out of something. As soon as I have that level of concern, the sudden rise in weighing exigency makes my skills shrink.

Suddenly it can be found in my underdeveloped communicative skills. It’s the despair that makes I want someone to understand my point. And the more I try, the more you’re losing the match. No matter how obsessive and compulsive you are towards it, no disciplined effort can actually do anything about it, at least for now.

There’s frustration in thinking that this failure could be avoided if I was more skilled. Something I couldn’t dream of achieving before can be achieved in the future, but even if I’m getting skilled enough to do this task there in the future, I might always have this unavoidable sense of failure.

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